2.26.2013

never, never, never buy a new car. ever.

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since the day i turned 16, i have driven some real winners. 

there was the black two door nissan sentra that got me around during my high school years. it cost $500 and although it was nothing to be proud of, it got me from point A to point B and it was a two door, which meant it was sporty.

then in my college years i drove a bright blue toyota tercel. i got my first speeding ticket in her while driving back home from college, and she stranded me on the side of the road in arkansas. even though the tercel left a lot to be desired, i felt a little sadness when i found out she had hit the hay while i was living in china.

and lastly, there was the red honda civic. i bought this guy before i learned to drive stick and spent many moments sweating like crazy while trying to navigate the hillier sections of denver. when i traded him in last may, i gave the bumper a swift kick and wished him a found adieu.

so when mr. lesley and i bought a brand, spanking new car this past may, i was ecstatic.
it always turned on, the heat always worked, there wasn't a scratch to be found on the exterior, and the interior had that perfect new car smell i love so much.

but then i learned what it really means to buy a new car.

it means every single person on the road is out to get you.
they want to hit you.
and no matter what you do, they will find you.

i learned this first in august when i got rear-ended exiting off the highway.
since it was my first accident, i was just happy that it wasn't my fault and moved on.

but then about a month ago, when we were sideswiped, i started to get a little suspicious.
we must be doing something wrong.
that green seems to be attracting the wrong kind of attention.

but then this past monday, my suspicions were confirmed.

there i was, minding my own business, just driving through an alley near our apartment, when...BAM!
a woman backed out of her parking spot and slammed into the side of the car.
really?

she got out of the car and said, "i'm so sorry. i've never been in a car accident before. i don't know what to do."
to which i aptly responded, "oh, don't worry. i know exactly what to do."

i have to say, all the years with my amazingly crappy cars and i wasn't in a single accident.
nine months in a brand new car and we've already got three under our belts.

so, whatever you do...DO NOT...and i repeat...DO NOT buy a new car.
or if you do, save yourself the time and go ahead and paint a bullseye smack dab in the middle of it.
it will make it easier for everyone.

trust me.

 

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