I DO ALL THE THINGS! Or how I scared my husband, the animals, and the roofers next door.

i realized a long time ago that you can't expect your husband to know what you want. 

no amount of "signals" on your part can take the place of just calmly saying "right now, i feel __________/i would really like you to do ___________/i'm upset because ___________." 

you get the idea.
hints get you...nowhere.

but sometimes what we know we should do in our heads and what we decide to do moving forward are on the complete opposite ends of the spectrum. 

i have quite a lot of experience in this area.
let me explain.

a few weeks ago, the concept of a "honey do" list came up, and nick had no idea what it was.
he had never even heard the term.
{i have no idea how this is possible either.}

well, i used that as a great opportunity to explain what it was and then make one for him! 

brilliant, i know.
he's so lucky.

this list had three items on it.

1. buy a shelf for the garage.

2. organize the garage.

3. fix the drawer in the kitchen. 

easy peasy, right? 

so this last saturday, nick checked off the first item with a quick trip to home depot.
then he came back and set it up.
it was great.
i marveled at his initiative and productivity.

then came time for step number two.
the whole organize the garage thing.
we started working together. going through boxes, condensing, throwing things out.

and then, like i usually do, i took over.
it only took a few "actually, i was thinking that should go over there" comments for him to hand over the reigns with a casual "let me know if you need anything" as he went back inside.

and that's when it all went down hill.
it was hot and i was sweating and i didn't know what to do with half of the crap and nick was inside WATCHING neflix and he was even LAUGHING {the nerve.}
i was left to suffer the fate of my bossiness, and i wanted him to know i was not happy about it {even though it was my own fault.}

so, i started slamming boxes and muttering under my breath, just sure that he would hear me and come ask if everything was ok.

as you could have guessed, my signals were not effective, and when i was finished i came inside, proceeded to give him the silent treatment, until he had no choice but to say, " is everything ok?"

and here's where it really gets good.
i looked up at him and screamed at an ungodly volume,
"I DO ALL THE THINGS!!!!!"

blank stare.

"I WAS OUTSIDE DOING YOUR JOB! AND YOU WERE HERE LAUGHING?!?!?!
YOU DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THE DISHWASHER NEEDED TO BE EMPTIED?!?!?!?!

the blank stare continued, followed by, "you're scaring me."

to which i responded {still yelling}…
"YOU SHOULD BE SCARED!"

oh lord.

i knew i was acting crazy.
i knew this was not the way to communicate.
on the plus side, i wasn't trying to drop hints, but my directness and volume were scaring everyone and everything in a 50 miles radius

i was letting out all the crazy.

he tried to make things better with a "but i told you to let me know if you needed anything" which didn't really help, although by that point i was laugh/yelling, the real indicator of being a true looney tunes.

eventually, the conversation went into completing the list vs. seeing what needs to be done and just doing it.
aka being a man vs. being a woman.

eventually i calmed down, the animals came out of hiding, nick wasn't quite so scared, and i decided to cut his manhood a little slack.

the moral of the story?
i am crazy.
nick is a man.
and maybe someday we will live happily ever after.